Masquerade Dates (T'veli)

Double checking to make sure his hair, clothes and boots were all in perfect order, he walked out of the Barracks and towards the lake. He thought he had seen Tiv headed that direction earlier.

Q'rijn after speaking with T'veli the other day felt like perhaps it wouldn't be so hard to ask the other boy if he wanted to go to the masquerade with him. Even Keadilanth had pointed out, what was the worst that could happen? If T'veli was already going with someone then he'd be going alone and if he didn't ask, he would still be going alone. At least Tiv might be free and might say yes.

Keadilanth was being none too helpful in saying that it was more likely Tiv would have plans since the other boy seemed to have many friends and admirers. Even so, it would be nice to see and talk with the other young man again.  Continuing to walk till he spotted T'veli walking away from the lake, he waved.

"Hey T'veli. Are you headed somewhere in particular?" Q'rijn asked and looked the other man over as if inspecting him rather than admiring.

T'veli had just finished oiling Velikath, when Q'rijn spoke to him. Tiv was still wet from the lake (it was easier to just take a quick dip in the lake after getting coated in oil, not matter how cold it was), and when Q'rijn looked him over, Tiv flushed, knowing that he looked like a drowned wherry, and that he should have probably spent a little more time drying off before leaving the lake- his shirt was a little wet, as where his shorts, and his bare feet were leaving faint footprints behind him.

"I was thinking about getting something to drink, if you'd like to come with me?" T'veli offered, pausing in front of the Brownrider. Mostly, he was hoping to drink something warm, but Tiv was never opposed to food, and he'd have to stop by the dining hall anyway.

Besides, Q'rijn had been good company the other day after they'd finished going over the harness straps. Tiv was sure that they'd have just as good of a time today. If Q'rijn wanted to be seen in public with him, that was- from the way Q'rijn was examining what Tiv was wearing, T'veli could absolutely see Q'rijn calling him slovenly, and refusing to go eat with him until he was properly dressed.

It shouldn't matter what you look like, as long as I look good. Velikath reminded him, and Tiv grinned for just flash before tamping it down. Vel always said the best things to remove his worries. And she did look good- he'd made sure to slather ever flakey inch of her before he'd left her to her sunning.

Being who he was, he didn't say much of anything at first. T'veli wasn't really dressed enough to go somewhere like the Weyrhall was he? Q'rijn knew people would stare. He didn't want anyone else looking over the other Weyrling. Q'rijn was just starting to work on his own courage. What if someone asked Tiv out before he did. So he bit back the remark circling his brain, he was headed to the dining hall dressed like that?

At least he offered to drag you along while other men stare at him.
Thanks for that.
Anytime.

"If you don't mind." He said genuinely. Falling into step beside the other man, he said, "Everyone seems to have vanished from the Barracks today. I guess everyone is getting ready for that party..."
To him it was just a party. It could be more than that if he could just get up the courage to be blunt and honest with Tiv.

Even if at this moment, the expectation was he would be declined. The green weyrling likely had his eye on someone else. He could make a guess on who that person was. Tiv obviously was not the best at judging people. He assumed not only that Q'rijn was crafter born, but also that he was straight. He probably in return assumed that Nova was not straight because he was a bluerider. Maybe he wasn't but he sure did try to be larger than life whenever a certain female weyrling was around.

Q'rijn wouldn't gossip but he found that observing people could tell him quite a lot about them.

"Really?" Tiv managed to keep himself from making a comment that even if people were in the barracks, he doubted that Q'rijn would have sought them out to go to the Weyrhall. T'veli was absolutely Q'rijn's new best friend (whether Q'rijn was aware of it or not).

"I mean, I guess that makes sense. I was talking to Vinnie about what some of the Riders were doing for the Ball. I'm going to wear a mask- I don't have anything nice enough to be a real costume though. Maybe they'll do this again? They probably will, I mean, if it goes well."

Tiv continued walking at his normal pace, (Q'rijn was several inches taller than him, and probably normally walked faster. Tiv was still a little tired from his swim, and didn't feel like approximating how fast Tiv assumed Q'rijn normally paced.) and ran his fingers through his hair quickly to stop the water from trickling down his face.

"Did you see if anyone had a costume? I want make sure that I can recognize-" Here Tiv paused, and flushed. He was going to say Nova's name, even though he knew that Nova liked Raelastriata, and even though Nova probably liked boys (he was a Bluerider, after all), Nova probably didn't like Tiv.

"Um, everyone from our class. Make sure they are getting into too much mischief." It was not an elegant save, but Tiv wasn't particularly skilled at deception.

"Yeah. There may have been a couple people lingering but for the most part everyone is out." He said matter of factly. He did not consider that maybe Tiv wanted to sound special. There some things that Q'rijn would never understand. Making an effort though might help in the long run.

Not expecting T'veli to keep up with him, Q'rijn walked much more slowly than usual. It gave him time to enjoy the walk. A leisurely pace was probably a good thing for him. "I'm not sure what to wear really. Since it is a masquerade we're probably required to be masked." He would probably have a lengthy discussion with his dragon about the purpose of dressing up. Q'rijn always preferred to be dressed for the occasion. He could probably trade some of his own handiwork for something to wear in return.

"Well if you need someone to spot you a few marks, I'm sure I'll have extra when I sell some of the things I've been working on." It would really be a shame if T'veli didn't have something nice to wear. Q'rijn would probably be the only one staring at the green rider though.

"Not sure about Nova." He said guessing that he was worried more about him since they were his friends. "He hasn't asked anyone to the masquerade yet as far as I know though..." Q'rijn offered as nicely as he could manage. Let T'veli learn that Nova wasn't interested in men the hard way. Better he got the information first hand and no from himself.

"Some of the guys already had outfits from what I understood and were in pursuit of the perfect mask." He had some ideas for his own but he needed to run them by his brown. "I saw Raelestriata dragging V'nius to a weaver club thing... not really sure what that is but Raelestriata said they were meeting a couple of Candidate girls there."

Shrugging, "Haven't seen anyone's outfit yet. I suppose that is part of the fun though, right? Not knowing until you unmask. I wonder how many people will mistake me for someone else. I mean if you don't consider a person's face, only their body type and skin tone...there are sure to be some mix ups." He could almost laugh at that thought.

"Has anyone in our class been asked to the masquerade yet?" He was more wondering out loud then anything. He was losing his resolve too. If no one else had asked someone then maybe he shouldn't. Maybe the timing was wrong.

"I'm not sure if anyone's been asked yet." Tiv paused for a mental check. "No, I think one of the female greenrider's got asked? I'm not sure if it was just speculation though, I wasn't really paying attention." Which was unusual, but that had been a stressful day.

They'd finally reached the hall, and Tiv made a beeline for the side table that was still full of food. Most of it wouldn't be warm anymore, but there was a jug of klah on the table that would more than make up for cold food.

"You should save your marks for your own outfit." Tiv said, a teasing smile on his face. "I doubt you were Searched with clothing nice enough for a ball, and I have some connections, you know?"

Tiv really didn't, but he also didn't have any way of earning marks to pay Q'rijn back (not until he graduated, and was awarded a stipend of some sort), and Tiv didn't like to owe people. It wasn't a smart choice.

"Besides, if you put some effort into your costume, you could absolutely fool people into thinking you were someone else!" Tiv grinned, pilling food onto a plate, and gathering a cup of klah close to his chest before heading to a seat (after checking to make sure that Q'rijn was following him).  

"And I hope Vinnie gets something really exciting. He deserves it, you know? Nice kid."

"Really?" He said, a little surprised that no one had been asked and that Tiv didn't have any real details on the one person who was asked. Generally he was someone who knew the gossip. "I'm wondering if anyone asked and simply was rejected?" If people were being rejected, he would likely be one of them. And how was he supposed to ask T'iveli if practically everyone else was going solo? Tiv probably would rather go with his friends then.

Q'rin, threw some meatrolls on his tray and a couple of pieces of fruit, some salad like items, some bread, a couple of slices of pie... when he was done loading up his tray it seemed like something three or four people could eat. Then he took a pitcher of water and a glass. he would probably drink the entire pitcher.

The young man ate that much food all the time. He had to, to keep his muscles and he might still be growing or not but it seemed like he could eat and eat and eat and there was always more room for food.

"If you are sure..." He said, "Well maybe ask Raelestriata where she was getting hers made. I don't think she could afford a nice outfit either..." Q'rijn didn't really know that the other two had a strained relationship. Mostly because of Nova, but strained nonetheless.

"I'm definitely wearing a mask. Maybe I will even surprise you." He said with a smile. Maybe he would, maybe he wouldn't but he would definitely try. "Yeah, Vinnie is a good guy. Glad you two are friends. I'm surprised neither of you have been asked yet." He said with a shrug. Hopefully it would be taken as a compliment but then Tiv did seem to be completely oblivious when someone liked him.

He had taken a seat across from T'veli and begun to eat. Much like everything about Q'rijn, he was a quiet, polite eater. And this was where it was obvious he must have been raised in the Hold. He had a napkin on his lap and he ate as if his utensils were to be used for graceful movements only. Each item on his tray was to be eaten a particular way. The most efficient and clean way possible. He sat straight, his elbows never touched the table in front of him.

Tiv watched Q'rijn eat, suddenly feeling very self-conscious. Tiv was lanky, and usually sprawled over seats, and leaned every which way, but seeing how polite and proper Q'rijn was acting. Shells, it was amazing that Q'rijn was willing to be seen with Tiv in public. T'veli awkwardly tried to arrange himself to be more like the Brownrider, but he wasn't particularly successful, and he looked rather uncomfortable.

"That would make sense." Tiv added, after swallowing the first bite of his bread. "I mean, I wouldn't want to admit to being rejected, and everyone's been playing their cards very close to their chest. Especially since we've still got so much time left as Weyrlings- if you do get rejected, we're still together for like, another turn." Tiv shifted a little bit, trying to copy Q'rijn's pose, but Tiv's elbows were still on the table.

"Yeah, I'll talk to Raelestriata. Besides, she probably knows what everyone is dressing as, and she'd probably tell me." She probably wouldn't- or at least, Tiv wouldn't really trust anything she told him, but that didn't matter. Q'rijn really didn't need to hear about the Greenrider drama in the Weyrling class. He was a Brownrider, he wouldn't understand.

"I'm surprised about Vinnie too." Tiv confided, leaning forward a bit. "But he's very shy- maybe he's too hard to get close to- it's pretty awkward to ask someone to go out with you when you can only talk to them in front of other people."

Tiv ignored the flush that had spread to his ears. Q'rijn didn't mean anything by his comment. Tiv was a decent looking male greenrider. It was a little surprising that no one had asked him. And it wasn't a good surprise. Probably they'd listened to him talk before they'd asked, and his personality had chased his admirers away.

Q'rijn ate a little more food before taking a second to watch the other man eat. It was a little amusing to see T'veli trying to mimic his own eating habits. There was no reason for him to do so. Q'rijn's hold habits had not died in the crafthall like they should have. Although being fastidious and proper was not a crime, it did tend to make other people a little uncomfortable around him at meal times.

He nodded, "It helps to be outspoken and know what you want. I understand how V'nius feels."

"I think a lot of the time, its that fear of rejection that keeps people apart. You'd rather be friends with someone and still be close than to tell them your feelings and be rejected. Then your friendship is never the same again." He thought, feeling that it was a logical path to go down with a friend. Being close, doing things together, it could create emotional attachment.

He could just as Tiv now about going to the masquerade with him but he really wanted to know if T'veli wanted someone specifically to ask him. "If you could have anyone here at the Weyr go to the masquerade with you, who would you choose? It doesn't have to be someone who you feel would say yes, just imagine you could ask anyone and whoever you asked would say yes."

Q'rijn might not answer in return but it would be interesting to know what T'veli thought.

Tiv's face, always expressive lit up like a glow when Q'rijn asked his question. It wasn't like Tiv didn't think people knew about his crush on Nova. He was fairly sure that everyone in their class knew that Tiv was harboring not-so friendly feelings for the Bluerider.

But still, to have to voice it himself was very embarrassing.

"I mean, I know it's not going to happen." Tiv said slowly, before eating more food and clamming up for just a minute. After swallowing, the Greenrider continued, hesitantly.

"Nova's just, you know, he's everything I look for. He's so funny, and nice, and friendly, you know? And I know that he and Raelestriata have their whole thing, but I mean, if it was a wish, Nova." Tiv, at this point, was bright red, and shoved food in his mouth looking down, awkwardly.

"What about you? I know you're not big on the whole sharing thing, but you wouldn't begrudge me a little gossip, right? Not after you had me bare my heart like that!"

He watched the other man turn red and he knew how hard it must be to feel so strongly for someone who always put another friend above him. Nova was obviously completely unaware of Tiv's feelings. He almost wanted to find Nova and tell him that he had to make some kind of decision. He could not have one friend who loved him and the other who he pined after. It was hurtful and maybe he was still just a little bit protective of T'veli's feelings, even if he had none at this time for Q'rijn himself.

"I don't really know anything about Raelestriata and Nova. I thought they were just friends." He pondered this a moment, "Well Nova hasn't asked anyone, so there is hope yet. Right?"

Q'rijn gave T'veli as serious a look as he could, "I'm in a very similar position you are. Only I don't think the person I'd like to go with has any idea and we're not friends or anything just yet but I'm thinking I can change that. I know he likes someone else so I'll have to wait." He wasn't giving up though. He had all the time in the world. Nova being disinterested would eventually make Tiv crave for someone who cared about him and e would start looking for another person. When that happened Q'rijn would be waiting.

He wanted to be a little ambiguous. Maybe he would be able to look back and call himself a coward. Would it be so horrible to tell him? Mostly because he really wanted to become friends with T'veli and then hopefully, his attraction for the other young man, mingled with their friendship would develop into something more. Tiv might be able to give him a chance later. Just not right now, not while he had feelings for someone else.

Tiv frowned at Q'rijn. Q'rijn knew that Nova and Raelestriata weren't just friends. Everyone knew that. They were caught up some soft of complex mating dance, and Tiv knew better than to get his hopes up. It wasn't like Nova wasn't going to want to explore any attraction he might have for a man while pursuing a woman. Life didn't work like that!

And Tiv had bared the name of his crush, and Q'rijn had given in a vague statement in response. Which was completely unacceptable, especially since Tiv really wasn't sure who Q'rijn was talking about.

There were a lot of people that Q'rijn wasn't really friends with, and there were a lot of people who were flirting, or in relationships with other people.

And had Q'rijn said he? No, that couldn't be right. Well, brownriders could be interested in men, but Q'rijn was hetero. He would have said something if he wasn't. He would have. They were friends!

"No hope." Tiv said seriously. "I'm not getting my hopes up. It won't happen, but I hope I'll have fun anyway." Tiv usually did. No matter the circumstances.

Although he knew even before he said anything that he was going to be a hypocrit, he saw a distinct difference in their positions. Tiv was really good friends with Nova already and blueriders were more likely to be bisexual than brownriders. Odds were that Nova might be interested if he didn't think things were going anywhere with Raelestriata.

"Are you sure? I mean I don't think Nova has said anything to Raelestriata. She seems completely oblivious." He paused. His logic working things out in his head. "And that is the problem isn't it. You aren't telling Nova how you feel and he isn't telling her how he feels and so you're all stuck in a hopeless loop. Someone is going to have to be brave."

Words were different than deeds and he knew his own failure. "Not that I am allowed to talk." He said with a shrug, "I'm not any braver. I won't ask the person I like out until he stops his pining for another man. Then maybe I'll have a chance. But I won't give up hope. What do we have if we don't have hope?"

And on that note, if he couldn't have Tiv as a lover just yet, he could try to get him to go with him and some other people as a group. It wasn't exclusive but at least he could pretend for a bit that Tiv wanted to be there with him. "Well if you, Vinnie and some of the other Candidates don't have dates to the ball, we could all go together as friends. Maybe we'll meet some people there to distract us."

Tiv was going to respond to Q'rijn's Nova comments, but was distracted by realizing that he hadn't misheard Q'rijn the first time.

"Yeah, we should absolutely go as friends." Tiv agreed easily, still staring at Q'rijn, Tiv's plate of food forgotten in front of him.

Tiv stared at Q'rijn for a good minute, before deciding that Tiv really did need to comment on Q'rijn's secret keeping. It wasn't good behavior to start a friendship off on, and Tiv disliked surprises. Okay, that wasn't true, Tiv loved surprises, but, well, no, Q'rijn should have told him!

Tiv was an excellent wingman, after all. He could help Q'rijn win over the boy of his dreams! Women were confusing, but Tiv mostly understood men.

"Wait, you never told me you like men!"

Q'rijn was slightly relieved, at least they would be there as friends. Then he would be able to watch out for him at the masquerade and not have to worry too much. They would still be around eachother. He could use that as an opportunity to say something, if the timing was right. He could be patient, knowing T'veli longed for someone he was not going to have meant that eventually he would be emotionally available again.

"Good. We can leave from the Barracks together and then it won't be awkward. At least...not too awkward." OKay it was probably still going to be awkward for some people. Maybe not so much for him. Well as long as Tiv didn't have a date it wouldn't.

Q'rijn flushed, one had to remember that Tiv was weyrbred and being homosexual was okay. There was still some shame in Q'rijn that he tried to deal with which made it difficult to tell anyone his preference. "I don't tell people." In fact he shouldn't have said he was besotted with anyone and now Tiv knew he liked men. And maybe that was a step in the right direction but he felt out of place.

"I know I shouldn't feel like, like this is a bad thing. I cannot help but feel some shame in admitting it. So I don't tell people about it because I have a hard time admitting it to myself sometimes. I know I can't help who I'm attracted to. I knew people would assume I was heterosexual if I never said anything." If Q'rijn looked nervous that was an understatement of how he was feeling.

"I've never been attracted to any woman though. So I don't think I'm even bisexual. Except perhaps if Keadilanth were to fly a green with a female rider, though I suspect that will more than often be the exception and not the rule." It felt like a big admission but he wasn't sure it sounded like that.

Tiv felt a little uncomfortable with Q'rijn's explanation. For Tiv, the idea of being uncomfortable with a fundamental part of who you were- it was not good. It also meant that Q'rijn fit Tiv's partner profile.

Nice, Holdbred boys, who wanted to fool around with another male who was out and okay with his sexuality, like they thought it would rub off on them or something. Tiv made a quick mental note that if Q'rijn got drunk at the ball, Tiv should make sure not to be alone with him.

Tiv didn't want to end up in a position where he hooked up with a secretly homosexual Brownrider who was in love with someone else. He'd promised that he'd stop doing that when he Impressed, and Velikath wouldn't be pleased with him going back on his word.

And it would be hard to say no. It always was.

"Well, I'm glad you felt safe enough to tell me." Which, maybe Q'rijn had seen him and Vinnie, and that's why he felt safe to tell Tiv. That would make more sense. Tiv hoped that was the explanation.

"Maybe you should take Vinnie to the Masquerade." Tiv commented slowly, and seriously. "It might be good for the both of you to have someone to talk to about this."

"Well, I figured you wouldn't see it as something horrible. Weyrbred people tend to take this as normal, whereas my own family would be horrified." And he was very good at not seeming to like men, obviously, even men who were attracted to men thought he preferred women. Though how anyone could think that was beyond him. He didn't even really talk to women much.

"We should all go together, unless you both end up with dates." He said without any awkwardness, though he might be feeling a bit awkward at the moment. He could feel his shy emotions receding back into oblivion while he continued to finish off food, like no one's business.

"If you do, I hope I can steal you away for a dance."

Coward.
Its hopeless. He likes Nova.
Nova. Nova? What does that bluerider have that you don't.
People skills and an upbeat optimism that is quite magnetic.
You are harder to get to know, my rider. You feel things very deeply and though you are quiet, anyone who loves you will see that you are more loyal than that bluerider.There was a vehemence in his voice, as if he blamed the bluerider now for what his rider must suffer.
Promise you'll stay out of it.
I'll try. If Velikath's hurts you...I make no promises.

Q'rijn highly doubted that Tiv would do anything to hurt him on purpose. He didn't even know about Q'rijn's feelings.

"Course you may not even know its me dancing, if I have a sufficient mask."